RaNt

Friday, May 17, 2013

mattering.

“He found himself thinking that maybe stories don't just make us matter to each other - maybe they're also the only way to the infinite mattering he'd been after for so long.

And Colin thought: Because like say I tell someone about my feral hog hunt. Even if it's a dumb story, telling it changes other people just the slightest little bit, just as living the story changes me. An infinitesimal change. And that infinitesimal change ripples outward - ever smaller but everlasting. I will get forgotten, but the stories will last. And so we all matter - maybe less than a lot, but always more than none.”
---John Green "An abundance of Katherines"


I have never been one of those people who wanted to be famous and matter to the whole wide world. I never dreamed of being widely recognized or tremendously followed. Sometimes I even go out of my way just to be a wallflower. But I would be a hypocrite if I say that I don't want to matter to at least one person. Although I never want to be famous I still wanted to make a difference. To touch someone's life. I think that life is a shared experience, that we don't truly live unless we start being open with other people. I used to close myself off and put walls up but now I have learned that mattering means sharing and that touching someone's life means letting them touch your life as well.

ashamed.

Yesterday I was ashamed of myself for being discriminatory. I hope the man didn't feel hurt when my sister and I walked away from him. I knew he wasn't contagious but the initial reaction was just too strong and I guess I was really too weak to fight it. I'm sorry old man. I didn't mean to be discriminating.

Wednesday, May 08, 2013

Gap.

you are the gap here.
the time elapsed.
the absence felt.


 
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