bangag.

I FEEL LIKE A ZOMBIE.






need sleep.
forget Kant and Abe
forget pure relationship
forget SELF and
I AM EMPTY. EMPTINESS IS I.
forget networks and hubs
forget floorplans
forget IP addresses
BECAUSE THEY ALL SUCK
-------------------------------------

but oh dont make me smile
COZ I might fall.

ALL OVER AGAIN

OMG! idontknowna...

I want to marry you. I want to have kids with you. I want to build us a house. I want to settle down and grow old with you. I want to die when I'm 110 years old, in your arms. I don't want 48 uninterrupted hours. I want a lifetime. Mmm. Do you see what happens? I say things like that and you fight the urge to run in the opposite direction. It's okay, I understand. I didn't, but now I do, I do. You're just getting started and I've been doing this for a long time now. Deep down, you're still an intern, and you're not ready."

--Dr. Derek Shepherd-

Joel: [in the house on the beach] I really should go! I've gotta catch my ride.
Clementine: So go.
Joel: I did. I thought maybe you were a nut... but you were exciting.
Clementine: I wish you had stayed.
Joel: I wish I had stayed to. NOW I wish I had stayed. I wish I had done a lot of things. I wish I had... I wish I had stayed. I do.
Clementine: Well I came back downstairs and you were gone!
Joel: I walked out, I walked out the door!
Clementine: Why?
Joel: I don't know. I felt like I was a scared little kid, I was like... it was above my head, I don't know.
Clementine: You were scared?
Joel: Yeah. I thought you knew that about me. I ran back to the bonfire, trying to outrun my humiliation.
Clementine: Was it something I said?
Joel: Yeah, you said "so go." With such disdain, you know?
Clementine: Oh, I'm sorry.
Joel: It's okay.
[Walking Out]
Clementine: Joely? What if you stayed this time?
Joel: I walked out the door. There's no memory left.
Clementine: Come back and make up a good-bye at least. Let's pretend we had one.
[Joel comes back]
Clementine: Bye Joel.
Joel: I love you...
Clementine: Meet me... in Montauk...
-----------------------------------------------------
Clementine: Too many guys think I'm a concept, or I complete them, or I'm gonna make them alive. But I'm just a fucked-up girl who's lookin' for my own peace of mind; don't assign me yours.

-Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind-

How happy is the blameless vestal's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot
Eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd

-Alexander Pope-
from Eloisa to Abelard

olympic ulit! =)

after swimming and gymnastics, badminton and judo
its time for me to watch Track and Field
Yey!
who's to watch out for?
Usain Bolt of Jamaica for 200m
why?
because he is absolutely fantastic!
its like seeing Michael Phelps dominate the Individual Medley
I saw Bolt ran the 100m for semis and for the finals
and wow! its like he was flying!
-----------

Go Phelps! Go Phelps!

“When someone says you can’t do something, it shows that anything is possible,” Phelps said. “When you put your mind to a certain thing, it can happen. The biggest thing is nothing is impossible. All it takes is an imagination.”
-Michael Phelps


==================

8 golds in one Olympic event!
Wow!
=====

Mulan Jr.

its been a busy day
I went to the play wearing what I wore from the
gathering
I think I'm a bit overdressed but hey I've got no more
time to change
Anyway, I liked the play.
It was a bit short but I love the songs and the props.
Watching it made me miss theater production so much.
haaayyy..
oh well past is past gotta move on
But a good thing about watching today's play was seeing
Mavic again and having to watch the play at the premier
seats..hahaha
stupid usher guided us to the wrong seat
hahaha..so we ended up watching near the front and not on
the balcony and ultimately getting more than our money's
worth..things we get for stupidity..;p

Beijing Olympics

08/08/08
8:08 pm

Beijing Olympics opening ceremony

I stayed up till the late hours of the night just to watch the opening ceremony and I can certainly say it was totally worth it. Since gaining consciousness, I have never missed an Olympic opening ceremony and I can say (although with some bias of course) that Beijing's was by far the most elegant, extravagant and definitely most elaborate opening ceremony that I have ever watched. It certainly surpassed Athen's exciting light effects and even Sydney's fireworks. Barcelona's did not really compare so nothing worth mentioning there. (I'm sorry but the flaming arrow really scared me)
But I supposed it lacked the emotional aspect that Atlanta have in theirs. They certainly don't have a Muhammad Ali but hey they've got Yao Ming..haha. Also the olympic torch lighting was a bit anticlimactic. As compared to the previous torch lighting, Beijing's was a bit dull. I guess Sydney's was still the best on that aspect.
But overall I believe that Beijing was the best so far. Such a display of human talent, artistic architecture and technology superiority would certainly be hard to beat. I sooo love watching the opening ceremony!!! It was enjoyable and not at all boring.
=)

08/09/08
Day 1
Watched weightlifting, volleyball, boxing,judo and swimming

China deserved the gold in the 48kg Women's weightlifting event
Italy was great in volleyball
I pity the man from Samui for being knocked unconscious in boxing
I was totally in accordance with Argentina's coach in protesting the point
given to Korea's Pak Ok Song instead of to Pareto--that was a counterattack
move you idiots!
And Phelps! *sigh*
all I can say is --still no doubt the best swimmer!
But oh how I miss Thorpe. The relay would not be as exciting as it used to
without Phelps and Thorpe competing against each other. Australia vs. US
in the relay would not be the same without him there.
I was watching out for Thorpe on the medley or even on the freestyle event
but I didn't see him. It turns out he stopped competing last year. According
to the news it was because of "lack of motivation" whatever that means.

I also learned that we ranked somewhere in the 30s on the shooting
and archery event and that Tanamor would compete on Aug 13.
Molina would be competing tom for the breaststroke event, though I'm not
really sure.
Better check the schedule now..hehe..so
zaijian!
=)

The Return of the Prodigal Son.

in Theo class today Sir Bobby Guevarra was the one who lectured and I found
the class not only stimulating but surprisingly insightful.
He gave us excerpts from The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen
to read and I find this particular one very touching.

Searching Where It Cannot Be Found
At the issue here is the question: "To whom do I belong? To God or to the world?"
Many of my daily preoccupations suggest that I belong more to the world than to God.
A little criticism makes me angry, and a little rejection makes me depressed. A little praise
raises my spirits, and a little success excites me. It takes very little to raise me up or thrust me down.
Often I am like a small boat on the ocean, completely at the mercy of its waves. All the
time and energy I spend in keeping some kind of balance and preventing myself from being
tipped over and drowning shows that my life is mostly a struggle for survival: not a holy
struggle, but an anxious struggle resulting from the mistaken idea that it is the world that
defines me.

As long as I keep running about asking: "Do you love me? Do you really love me?" I give all
power to the voices of the world and put myself in bondage because the world is filled with
"ifs". The world says: "Yes, I love you if you are good-looking,intelligent, and wealthy. I love
you if you have a good education, a good job, and good connections. I love you if you produce much,sell much,
and buy much." There are endless "ifs" hidden in the world's love. These "ifs"enslave me, since it is impossible
to respond adequately to all of them. The world's love is and always will be conditional. As long as I keep
looking for my self in the world of conditional love, I will remain "hooked" to the world
--trying, failing, and trying again. It is a world that
fosters addictions because what it offers cannot satisfy the deepest craving of my heart.

I am the prodigal son every time I search for unconditional love where it cannot be found.
Why do I keep ignoring the place of true love and persist in looking for it elsewhere? Why
do I keep leaving home where I am called a child of God, the Beloved of my Father? I am
constantly surprised at how I keep taking the gifts God has given me-my health, my intellectual and
emotional gifts--and keep using them to impress people, receive affirmation and praise, and compete
for rewards, instead of developing them for the glory of God. Yes, I often carry them off to a "distant country" and
put them in the service of an exploiting world that does not know their true value. It's almost as if I want
to prove to myself and to my world that I do not need God's love, that I can make a life on my own,
that I want to be fully independent. Beneath it all is the great rebellion, the radical "NO" to the Father's love,
the unspoken curse: "I wish you were dead." The prodigal son's "NO" reflects Adam's original rebellion: his rejection
of the God in whose love we are created and by whose love we are sustained. It is the rebellion that places me
outside the garden, out of reach of the tree of life. It is the rebellion that makes me dissipate
myself in a "distant country".