mga survey galing kay cheenee

1. what thing/s you can consider that is very important to you?
- Love and Trust

2. do you like playing computer games?
- yep :P

3. do you love someone at the moment?
- i don't know

4. have you ever been in a relationship?
- Yes.

5. a serious one?
- Yes ..at least i thought it was

6. which do prefer a gun or a samurai?
- a gun coz its faster and lighter

7. which do prefer chocolates or flowers?
- Chocolates!

8. which do you prefer long haired/short haired girl/guy?
- Short haired guy

9. kissing with eyes open/closed?
- closed noh, its freaky to kissed with your eyes open, it is totally weird

10. last person who kissed you?
- beso-beso style..my mom

11. do you like holding hands?
- Yes.

12. dolls or bears?
- Bears definitely!

13. what's your sport?
- kahit ano

14. are you a varsity?
- Nope.

15. favorite color?
- red, white and blue

16. do you smoke?
- No and never will

17. do you drink?
- when the occasion calls for it

18. do you like shopping?
- when i have the money

19. do you miss someone right now?
- Yes very much

20. why are u answering this damn survey?
- have nothing to do

21. ang tanga mo nman...
- whatever!

22. friends tau?
- hu u?

----------------------------------

>bkit ba kac pinakawalan pa kita!?
** ewan ko nga din sau

>pede ba mkipagbalikan?
** HELL NO!

>lam mo mas masaya ako sau noon
** Ako rin.

>mahal pa rin kita!
** harharhar! cno niloloko mo?

>sana maitama natin ung mali natin noh!?
** ikaw na lang tinatamad ako eh

>kailan nga ba tau huling nag-usap?
** million years ago..

>pede bng samahan mo ko?
** ayoko nga

>ui! wag mo ko iiwan ah!
** mag-isa mo!

>nkapag move-on ka na ba? kac ako ndi pa!
** oo noh, ganun? kawawa ka naman pla

>lam mo pinagcchan ko lhat ng nngyari sa atin
**tlga???ows..maniwala?

>sna pla di na lang kita minahal!
** tlga? minahal mo ko? sori ndi ko kasi naramdaman..hahaha

>ayaw ng parents ko sau!
** sus alam ko na yan! dati pa kayang issue yan!

>lam mo sbi ng friends ko! d daw tau bgay...
** Wag ka magalala sbi din ng friends ko ndi din tau bagay

>alam mo pumanget ka!
** magsalamin ka nga..lumalabo na mata mo eh!

>nagbago ka na!
** sino ba hindi?

-----------------------------

~distance~

"One grows distant from another not because of hatred,
not because of indifference, but because of fear.
There's the fear that the hurt gets greater as one gets closer;
a recognition of the tendency to fall deeply,
and consequently drown in a quicksand of stupid irrationalities.
Sometimes what drives people away is not the absence of emotion
but the overwhelming presence of it.."

~summer classes~

let us forget about the very sad, whatever post i have below
i wanna write about something else
hmmm...
what could be a better topic than my summer classes
as you all know i was very doubtful of my enjoyment this summer
but after a week of summer classes
I must admit I am actually trying to reconsider my previous misconceptions
I think I'm going to like this summer course
Of course it is still too early to decide on that
but I really have a feeling that I am really going to like this semester
Maybe it has something to do with my having History165 this summer
Studying History reawakens something in me
It makes me remember my love for learning
And it makes me want to work harder and achieve more than just a passing grade
As a result I almost don't care that I have Stat and Acc class this summer
My love for History overshadows my apprehensions regarding
my management subjects
I just wish that it would be like this every semester
I hope there would always be a History class
so that I would always feel this optimistic towards all my subjects

anyway..
you know what else makes me want to go to school
eventhough it is practically like being inside an overheated oven
when I am inside the classroom?

CUTE and FUNNY professors

Mr.Dave Lozada's constant hirits and funny stories are enough
to make my mornings bright although I can't help but have some
lapse of attention every now and then
especially if he started to be corny
and then we go to Mr. Jumamil
his cute face and very
makulit antics definitely complete my mornings though I find
his ears distracting and his manner of talking impossible to comprehend I still like him

And so to wrap up my day
is Mr. Kim Enage's unique way of teaching
nothing compares to Enage tlaga
Even if he calls me constantly in class
I still think he is the best accounting prof ever

.....
im tired na
thats all for now
ciao!

~disappointment~

I was debating whether or not to write this here
but since I have no one to talk to
I finally decided that I should just let go of all my worries
and write all that I am feeling here
forgive the grammatical errors and the swear words
when you're in this kind of state
you just have no idea what you're writing
and i think i am allowed to be "drama queenish" here
this is my blog after all

------

Do you know that I hate the word DISAPPOINTMENT and every f*cking word
that can be derived from it and that have the same meaning
I hate seeing it written down
I hate hearing it
I hate seeing it on people's faces
especially when it is directed at me

If you really want to hurt me and make me cry
All you have to do is say that word in front me

And so why am I sharing this?
because lately disappointment was all around me
Why?

because I failed not one but two subjects

let me just tell you my sad story so you might understand

---------
I was expecting it of course but nothing could ever prepare me
to the horrors awaiting me
I remember telling a friend of mine the day before the distribution of grades
that the way I am feeling can be likened to that of a soldier marching his way to death
anyway
when I finally saw the results
and saw with weary eyes the confirmation of one of my biggest fears in life
I nearly fainted
but I told myself I have to be strong, so I fixed a smile on my face
try to work things out in my head
formed plans and tried to stay optimistic
eventhough inside my heart is pumping like crazy
and my mind is whirling like a freaking hurricane
The people I am with that day never realized how I really feel
I don't think they have any idea of what was really going on in my head
I can see in their faces the surprise that they endeavored to hide from me
but obviously to no success
They felt a little of my sadness and provided me with some comforting words
but those words never gave me the kind of comfort that I need
They keep saying things like
"ok lang yan, meron ngang iba dyan...."
as if I should rejoice in the fact that someone got lower grades than mine who
perhaps at that moment was crying and carrying the same burden that I was
carrying myself
"ok lang yan, kaya mo yan"
i don't think a reliance on the strength that i supposedly possessed is a good way
to comfort me because as far as I can see, the "strength" you're talking about
has just failed me bigtime
"you'll get through that..you're strong"
is that you saying that you won't be there to help me because apparently
I am strong?
"sayang, baka naman may other way pa"
thank you for subtly reminding me of my d*mn predicament
"sh*t sayang liz"
I know duh

my answers were not the words that i had written below each comforting phrase
but of course the polite words that according to society
I was compelled to give them
though I appreciate those kind words for all that they were really meant to be
I just cannot feel the necessary comfort that they should have given me
on the contrary
I felt even more depressed
because in addition to DISAPPOINTMENT
I now have PITY to deal with
and to me those were perhaps two of the worst possible feelings in the world
to deal with

so now let me continue

i managed to work some things out
and got relieved of some of my worries
I recollected myself and prepare for the nightmare that was awaiting me at home
When I got home
I saw to my dismay
the tear-stained face of my mother
and the pitying eyes of my sister
I felt my heart breaking
but I did not cry
I partly told them the truth and that they should have nothing to worry about
because I have gotten things worked out
I just have to attend summer classes and all will be well
If they believed me
I have no idea
I cannot bear to look at them
so I asked if I can eat my dinner
and implied that I do not wish to be questioned farther on the matter
I waited for my dad to get home
and those hours were perhaps the longest hours of my life
it was pure torture
and it was agony to see his face when my mom and i told him about my two Fs
but it was his speech and his sermon loaded with the words disappoinment and respect
that broke me
I obviously cried
and from that moment on
I knew I could never again
have the same relationship that I have always enjoyed with my father
Starting from that moment
I was not "Daddy's girl" anymore
I knew that he would never looked at me the same way again
In his eyes
I was the perfect epitome of disappointment

but i was able to hide it well from everyone
I was able to go through school again
like a normal individual
and converse with people like there is nothing wrong with me

but today
something happened

my favorite aunt called
it was an overseas call from saudi
this was obviously an unfortunate night for me
because I was the one who answered the f*cking call
she cheerfully greeted me
and as usual bantered with me
As to why she have to asked about my grades
I have no idea
And as to why I did not lie and told her the truth instead
I have no idea as well
It was really heartbreaking to hear her voice
It was a wonder I did not cry

God must be very angry with me
because it seem as though
my parent's disappointment was not enough punishment for me
now
my favorite aunt's disappointment added even more salt to my wounded heart


====

why is it that I am always the one who is expected to live up to expectations?
why is it that I am the one who is always relied on to follow every f*cking wish?
why me?

the answer has and always will be this:

I AM THE FIRST BORN
it is my responsibility

d*mn!!!
kung walang expectations
eh di wla dng disappointment

lecheng responsibility yan
tinanggal niyan sa akin ang karapatang mangarap para sa sarili ko

i just hate my life right now

If upon reading this you have the sudden urge to ask me
how I'm doing

don't ask me
because I am going to say I am ok
and you're going to think I am ok
which is of course not true

so to avoid any lies
lets just pretend nothing ever happened
just please be there when i need you

boredom=survey

since my class have been cancelled
and wla ako kailangan gawin
naisipan kong magsagot ng survey
kaya eto...
survey galore tau

QUESTIONS & LYRICS
1. Bakit ngayon ka lang?~ sori..lam mo naman lagi tlga ko late
2. Do you know where you're going to?~ uhmm..ndi..kaw san mo gusto?
3. Where do broken hearts go?~ dumpsite
4. Can you feel the love tonight?~ ndi pa gabi eh..so no
5. Can you paint with all the colors ofthe wind?~ kaw kaya try mo
6. Have you ever wished you weresomeone else?~ oo
7. Can you handle this?~ oo naman..cmon bring it on!
8. Have you ever loved somebody so muchit makes you cry?~ hmmm...
9. Don't cha wish your girlfriend washot like me?~ ndi dahil wla naman akong girlfriend noh
10. Who do you think you are?~ isang maganda at sexy na babae..laban ka?
11. Do you remember dancing inSeptember?~ oo..ikaw nga ata kasayaw ko nun eh
12. Nasaan ka na? Diba't pangakobabalik ka?~ sino ka?
13. Bakit ba ganyan? Damdamin ay dimaintindihan?~ bakit nga ba?
14. Ano nga bang meron siya na sa akinay di mo makita?~ OO NGA ANO BA MERON SIYA?
15. Where is the love?~ nasa akin..kunin mo kung gusto mo
16. Who is that girl I see, staringstraight back at me?~ SISA??? ikaw ba yan? ay mali si SADAKO pla
17. Bakit, bakit ba, iniwan akong nag-iisa?~ ndi kaya
18. Why do you always do this to me?~ ndi ko din alam

Isip ka ng isang tao. I-base mo sakanyaang mga isasagot mo. WALAng ibahan ngnaisip. MAGPAKATOTOO!!!
*//friend mo ba sya sa friendster?-- yup
*//anong lugar ang naaalala mo sakanya?-- La Salle
*//bket?-- Kasi un ang school niya
*//anong song ang naaalala mo sa kanya?-- At the beginning ata title nun
*//bket?-- kasi ung ang song namin
*//ok ba ang height?-- lagi niya sinasbi na mas matangkad siya so un..ok na rin
*//magaling ba kumanta?-- feeling niya..hahaha..pag siya may hawak ng mic wla na makakakuha nun
*//eh sumayaw?-- feeling din niya..hahaha
*//may kamukha ba syang artista/singer?-- sabi niya meron dw pro ndi ko makuha ang similarities
*//close ba kayo?-- oo nmn! =)
*//nakita mo na syang magalit?-- oo..kakatakot
*//eh ngumiti?-- xmpre naman
*//eh umiyak?-- xmpre..cno pa ba iiyakan nun?
*//ano fave food nya?-- madami..hehehe
*//bket sya ang napili mo pra sa surveyna to?-- miss ko na siya eh..ndi ko na kc nakakausap
*//pinaiyak ka ba nya?-- cguro nung mga bata kami..? not xur
*//pinaiyak mo ba sya?-- parang..
*//pinangiti ka ba nya?-- oo naman. sweet sya eh :) lagi ako may gift dun eh..ska may card pa
*//miss mo na ba sya?-- sobra...sobra..sobra!
*//talaga?--oo nga!
*//bket?-- ndi ko n nga nakakausap panu sira daw ung fon nila
*//kelan mo sya huling nakita?-- sembreak pa..waahhh..ang tagal na
*//saan?-- intramuros
*//msg. pra sa kanya?-- psstt...BES! miss na kita..=(..tawagan mo ko agad pag ayos na fon niyo
*//nagsisisi ka ba na nakilala mo sya?-- no! NEVER!