Flakyness.

gotta stop.

malapit na.

5 linggo nalang.
bawat araw importante.
kahit mga exam tinetreasure.
yung lahat ng stress nilalasap na.
pati nga graded recitation ok lang.
bawat lakad sa school,
bawat agawan sa parking lot,
bawat drive sa traffic ng katipunan
kahit nga yung bawat pag tago
kay kuya guard ineengrave
na sa memory.
ilang araw nalang maisusuot
ko na ang mainit na toga at magmamarcha
na sa ubod din ng init na cov court.
ilang araw nalang magiiba na naman ang
takbo ng buhay ko.
kaya nga lahat ng lakad ng barkada
sinusubukan kong puntahan.
kahit onting minuto lang ng lunch papatulan
ko na basta lang makasama ko sila.
haaayyyy
excited na talaga ko!!!!
kaya yang mga CTK at LS125 na yan
sisiw nalang!
kakayanin ko to!
5 weeks to a whole new life!
yey!

One of my favorite songs ever!

Waitin’ - Lala Music Code

Bet on me.Bet on you.

A moment in anger
means nonstop ranting.

The heck!
Just bet on everything!
I don't really care...
or do I?

Is perfection the only thing
that matters then?
Is it the only thing that makes
sense?

Make a gamble or maybe
just make an intelligent guess...

invest in the stock market
even if the market is down
perhaps losing might do you good
-----------------------
but i just cannot write it..
dammit!

Rehab.

I still find it hard to stifle my reactions to him.
I still got surprised at the jolt of emotions I experience
everytime I read his words.
By now I should have been well apprised
of his new plight, maybe even of his anger towards me but
I can never really let go.
Was it regret? Pride? or that overrated feeling they
call love?
Hardly.
I think it was just a case of over familiarity
combined with my possessive nature.
For years he was somehow mine
and he could really have been
had I surrendered.
And sometimes
its really just hard to forget.
But its even harder to pretend indifference
when all I want is to hear about his life,
to pretend nonchalance when I really
want to indulge, to force myself to forget
when I can vividly remember
when it was me.
It can be quite a battle,
this farce of forgetting.
Sometimes I even think of surrendering just
so I could end this synaptic torment.
But at the end of the day, I remember
why I didn't choose him in the first place.
I remembered that it was my choice that
hurt him and drove him away.
I have to let him get on with his life.
It would be selfish and cruel of me not to do so.
I would not cause more damage.
I would not be like *a** who after toying with my
heart and deftly betraying my trust,
endeavored to remind me every chance he got
that my heart was once his. I think the odious
man largely misinterpreted my obvious
attempts at reconciliation.
Its almost a year now since THE INCIDENT.
Surprising really how time seemed to move
so fast.
But I won't be wasting my time anymore
recalling my somewhat miserable and lonely
2008. I just have to write my thoughts here
so I could sort everything out.
Its always helpful to write, I make better sense
of things this way.
And so speaking of the future,
I think its about time I look forward.
I really can't wait for what the new year brings...

because I have finally come to terms with reality...

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
-- Mark Twain

A couple of hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. Never leave that till tomorrow, he said, which you can do today. This is the man who discovered electricity. You think more people would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd have to say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of rejection, sometimes the fear is just of making a decision, because what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we hadn't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still sometimes we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore. Until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin really meant. That knowing is better than wondering, that waking is better than sleeping, and even the biggest failure, even the worst, beat the hell out of never trying.
--Meredith Grey

It is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.
--The Little Prince

Revenge gets you even with your enemy, forgiving him puts you above him
--from patrick

I believe in the sun even when it is not shining,
I believe in love even when feeling it not,
I believe in God even when He is silent...
--Zvi Kolitz "Yosl Rakover Talks to God"

---------------------------------------------------

When you're 22 and single
people tend to question you
When you're 22 and still
a student
people tend to quantify you
but if you're anything
like me
even if you're 22
and all of the above
it doesn't matter
because right now
all that matters is that
being in the crossroads
would soon be finally over
and decisions
would soon be made.
Hope is back
in life
and everything would
fall into place.

-------------------------------
;p

My double digit birthday

book gift.ice cream puffs.long hair.tears.12midnight.jonathan.hugs.wow you're old.baby.kiss from mom.double kiss from dad.call from sis. songs for aunt.photocopy.copyright infringement.direct access.substantial similarity.circumstantial evidence. silly smile.fartboy.pullmyfingerfriend. louvre.da vinci code.that deserves an A. no bell.kolitz.existentialism.artwork finished.authentic faith.ah parang umbrella.shoulder bump.laughs.waffles.kiwi green tea.T-boy.getting fat.green jokes.couple talks.sugar-high.fog.birthday messages at my car.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------

THANK YOU!!!

first post of 2009

I MISSED BLOGGING!!!
but I miss the holiday more...

the holiday break is so short
I can hardly call it a vacation

did you know that I had slept
only 4 times in my own bed
in the entire holiday break

so
I MISSED MY BED!!!
hahaha

I spent the Christmas holiday up north
in Pangasinan with my mother's family
and then I spent the New Year down
south with my father's family

and I spent the in between time
attending parties, lounging at the condo
with my cousins and gossiping with
friends

despite the hectic traveling schedules
it was still a very nice holiday
it was a worthy vacation
i luuuurrrrvvvveeedddd it!!!
:)