stored up blogs.

stored blog posts from my laptop:

PERFECT
A perfect boyfriend is someone who would discreetly hold my hand in order to show me, however implicitly, his encouragement and support. He is someone who would hug me without fuss and would understand that I really just want to be held. He would not whisper words of love every time we kiss but he would kiss me sweetly bestowing in each lock of our lips all of his love. He would not promise me the world but he would endeavor to stay even when the whole world wants to leave. He would introduce me to his friends and would not care whether they like me or not. He would not mind if we spent time with my friends even if our dates were always cut short because we have to meet them. He would respect my need for privacy and would not pry on things that I deemed not important to him. He would not mind if I do not constantly text him because he knew how busy I can get. He would not wipe my eyes dry when I cry but he would tenderly hold me and let me cry my fill. He would not want to own my heart but would instead put all of his efforts in making me want to share his life. He would not treat me as a fragile, delicate princess but would treat me as his equal in every way. He would ignore me when he is angry, snap at me when he is irritated and throw little boy tantrums when I tease him but he would apologize thereafter and treat me with utmost respect. He would tease me, plague me and shower me with silly jokes in order to make me smile. He would also try his very best to take me out of my comfort zone. He would not promise me a happily ever after but would try to make everyday a fairytale worth telling. And most importantly, he would not lie to me and only say I LOVE YOU when he truly means it.

STEADY CASUAL AND LIGHT
I would have wanted my college life like this. Steady, casual and light. Sometimes when I’m gossiping nonsense and laughing like a hyena with my law school friends, I can’t help thinking how different it was when I was in college. I don’t feel as out of place here as I was there. I had friends there of course but somehow I never really adjusted. I always feel like I should prove that I deserve to stay and I never felt as relaxed as I am here. Always running around, rushing like crazy and fighting like hell to keep my place. It’s a pity really because I don’t think I fully enjoyed all that college life had to offer. There was always something more important to do and I never get to just hang out and have fun. But don’t get me wrong, I loved being at ADMU. ADMU was everything I always knew it to be and then some. More than some actually. But there was so much drama there, it was very heavy. I never felt quite right. At least here, even if I don’t like the polluted place, I don’t feel as heavy as I used to. Like I said, its STEADY, CASUAL AND LIGHT here. Full of Angels and mean girls like me. Hahaha! =)

Goodbye, war…

Red skies
The few who are standing are still fighting
Gunshots and chaos
I can feel the blood dripping

White clouds
A flag is raised and put up
Cheers and victory shouts
I am relieved to know it is finally over

Blue moon
There is smoke all over
Hazy and obscure
I had always feared this calm aftermath

Black night
There are no stars
Darkness and then silence
I never knew it could be this serene…

-rich-

blogging barrage.

Ondoy did these...
Our house was flooded.
My favorite marketing book destroyed.
My mom and dad tired.
No electricity.
My phone's battery dead.
My car's battery was also dead.
Can't write case digests.
Can't read Civil Code.
My sister stranded at UST.
My cousin stranded at San Beda.
Bar exam suspended.
Spent the night at Lola's house
pathetically playing Scrabble.
And traveling today despite the
frigging rain and dirty streets
so I can go to the dorm and study.
------------------------------------
But those are nothing compare to what
happen to other less fortunate than I am...

Exactly why I HATE rainy weather

updating.

nothing much going on except cases..digests..provisions..cases again..and digests again..and provisions again..oh and recits! and quizzes and failing midterms...but then there's the daily gossips with the girls..dinner with the girls and dadi bj to look forward to...oh and the regular teasing bouts with Tubig..then there's the catching up with college and highschool friends...but nothing much really...just doing the same thing over and over again..soooo monotonous..except for the occasional friday dates...speaking of friday dates..last friday was unexpected...it wasn't very awkward as I had expected but then M*xine being there was also unexpected..gee what must she think of me?...seeing me with a different guy everytime??? damn embarrassing..but I must say how natural it felt to be with N*el...linking hands with him felt so Natural..haayy..wonder why...anyway back to my updating...i have also been thinking a lot during my free time..free time meaning 15 mins everyday..hahaha...i have been thinking a lot about how life changes everytime and how different I view life in different stages of my life..sooo weird..and about politics too...never thought I'd be sooooo interested about politics...I'm becoming weirder everyday...so anyway I've got to go...have some digesting yet to do..

back from Peace retreat.

Pax!

That was supposedly the theme for our retreat but unfortunately I didn't feel that during the retreat.
If I felt anything at all during the retreat it was anxiety, tiredness,and slight starvation. But there are also some good feelings, it wasn't all that bad.
The retreat was not what I expected it to be. The program was a bit too "highschool" for me. Too much talk of death and too many lectures. There was little chance for interaction and absolutely no time for reflection. My highschool retreats were better and my ateneo recollection was way better. I was really disappointed.
The retreat house was also very disappointing. The place is small but at least it they had a well-manicured garden with fountain. The dinning area downstairs where we eat most of the time is clean but is very compact. Also the rooms are not well-kept, at least ours was, I don't know about the other rooms. There were cockroaches and big mosquitoes, I was really afraid to sleep. The pillows and bedsheets were smelly and looks unclean. The bathrooms don't have a working shower and hot water. So when I was there I felt like I was in a boot camp. I didn't get much sleep and for the first time in my life I took a bath for 5 mins. I felt so dirtttttyyyy.

But at least I cried. I also got to confess and share my thoughts with friends.