The Rescue.

So I had recently finished reading a book by Nicholas Sparks and since Banking Laws don't interest me at the moment I decided to type my favorite parts of the book.

All the years of wondering exactly what that meant, all the years of loneliness, had led to this place, this here and now. He reached out and took her hand, feeling the softness of her skin as a well of tenderness rose within him.

You know how you are in things like this. Remember Valerie? Remember Lori? If you don't, I do. You go out with 'em, you pour on the charm, you spend all your time with them, you get them to fall in love with you...and then wham--end it.

But as idyllic as everything seemed, there were moments in which Denise sensed an undercurrent of restlessness in Taylor she couldn't exactly pin down. As he had during their first night together, Taylor would sometimes get that unreadable, almost distant look after they made love. He would hold her and caress her as usual, but she could sense something in him that made her vaguely uncomfortable, something dark and unknowable that made him seem older and more tired than Denise had ever felt.

On the surface, everything seemed the same. All that had really changed was a suddenly intense devotion to work, which he'd already explained. Yet...

She hated waiting for the phone to ring.
It wasn't like her to be this way;the experience a new one.
*******Not that she stopped living her life, as her roommate had done. She had too many responsibilities for that. But it didn't stop her from racing to the phone every time it rang and feeling disappointed every time it wasn't Taylor. The whole thing made her feel helpless, a sensation she detested. She wasn't nor had she ever been, the helpless type, and she refused to become that now.

I've just been thinking that we've been seeing each other for a few months now, but sometimes I don't know where you stand on all this. I mean this last couple of weeks...I don't know...sometimes it feels like you're pulling away. You've been working such long hours that we haven't had much time together, and then we you didn't call...
She trailed off, leaving the rest unspoken, knowing she'd already said these things before. She felt his body stiffen just a little as she heard his answer coming out in a hoarse whisper.

I've already explained that.
Yes, you did---you explained each and every situation. But don't you see the pattern?
He turned toward the clock on the wall, staring at it, stubbornly avoiding her question.
Denise ran her hand through her hair. "But more than that, you don't talk to me anymore. And I'm beginning to wonder if you ever really did."

Sure you are. You're trying to get in my head so you can try to fix what's wrong. But nothing's wrong Denise, at least not with me. I am who I am, and if you can't handle it, maybe you shouldn't try.

I'm not blind to what's been happening to us these last few weeks. You're pulling away from me---from both of us---no matter how much you try to deny it. It's obvious, Taylor. What I don't understand is why you're doing it.
I've been busy at work, Taylor began halfheartedly.
That may be true, but it's not the whole truth.
Denise took a deep breath, willing her voice not to break.
I know you're holding something back, and if you can't, or don't, want to talk about it, there's not much I can do. But whatever it is, it's driving you away.

I don't want to lose you.
His voice almost a whisper.
Seeing his haggard expression, she took his hand and squeezed it, then reluctantly let it go. She could feel the tears again, and she fought them back.
But you don't want to keep me either, do you?
To that he had no response.

Why? Do you want to rescue me too, Taylor?***********
Oh Taylor, it's the same thing. She hesitated, her expression at once knowing and sad.
It's what you've been doing your whole life. You sense that someone needs help, and if you can, you give her exactly what she needs. And now, you're turning your sights on us.
I'm not turning my sights on you.
Yes you are. It's what you did with Valerie after her boyfriend left her, it's what you did with Lori when she felt so alone. It's what you did with Denise when you found out how hard her life was. Think of all the things you did for her, right from the very beginning.

You feel the need to make things better, Taylor. You always have. You may not believe it, but everything in your life proves that over and over. Even your jobs. As a contractor, you fix things that are broken. As a fireman, you save people. Mitch never understood that about you, but to me, it was obvious. It's who you are.

When you hit bad patches your life, you don't turn to me, you don't turn to friends. You come here. No matter what the question or the problem, you always come to the decision that you're better off alone, just like now.
**************** Can't you see why that hurts me? I can't help but think how sad it must be for you to live your life without people---people who could offer you support or simply lend an ear when you need it. And it's all because of me.

Loving someone and having them love you back is the most precious thing in the world. It's what made it possible for me to go on, but you don't seem to realize that. Even when love is right there in front of you, you choose to turn away from it. You're alone because you want to be.

And because of that, you've shut yourself off from the world. I don't know why...maybe you don't think you deserve to be happy, maybe you're afraid that if you finally allow yourself to love someone, you'd be admitting that you weren't responsible...maybe you're afraid of leaving your own family behind. I don't know what it is, but all those things are wrong. I can't think of another way to tell you.